The Merry Go Round

My last post was well over a month ago, and I praised myself for achieving the final visit with my CBT Therapist.  Today I have come home to a letter from the Therapist to my GP extoling me for my quick progress to get back to my old self.  Praising me for making significant changes to my life, more specifically changing jobs.  I did this and I was happy.

Now, a few months in and the façade of niceties from my colleagues has vanished.  The games of politics are invading my peace of mind that I worked so hard to achieve.  Promises were made to me about progressing in a role.  As I am a Contractor, I do seek out the opportunity to be a full time permanent employee.  Who wants to constantly have to look over their shoulder wondering when the talk will come to say you are no longer required.  So, I being a dutiful and committed Contractor gave my utmost to the role I was handed.

I have a bit of a sixth sense with people and body language.  Last Friday I saw my big boss speaking with my Line Manager.  I put two and two together and knew that the end was nigh.  Today, on Monday I broached the topic in a very casual way.  Low and behold I was right.  The role that was promised to me is not coming to fruition.

I dropped my own bombshell and let my Line Manager know that I knew something was up as I have now applied for another internal role.  His eyes widened in surprise but his words were supportive.  Okay I can only take it that he was being genuine however I want the honesty.

I am sick to death of employers holding you to their mercy about progression and acknowledgement for the good work that you do.  Instead of treating grown adults like children, make an effort to be forthcoming with good and bad news.  No one needs to have the decisions about their future packaged in doubts and condescending tones.

And so I am on the merry go round again.  Selling myself to the highest bidder.  Wading through poorly written job specifications.  Pandering to unprofessional Recruitment Consultants.  Trying to wedge the door open to the next opportunity.  Bring it on!  I am ready and willing to take on this challenge: permanent job with good salary and benefits!